This may not be the most tasteful subject, but here goes: Ladies, how much marijuana can you store in your vagina?
I ask out of genuine curiosity. As a middle-aged heterosexual man, I have had the pleasure of exploring a few cis-female bodies in my time. I’ve known women who I thought could never possibly bear a child and I’ve met women who I thought must’ve just finished bearing a child. I recognize there is a lot of diversity in body types and that the survival of the species depends on women storing and expelling eight-pound humans from there.
So what’s the verdict? An eighth? An ounce? A quarter-pound? A pound? A kilo? Judging by the actions of the police lately, I’ve got to believe there is an epidemic of women just packed full of weed waddling all over the United States.
This Is Not What We Meant By “The Show-Me State”
Let’s start with the most recent case out of St. Louis, Missouri, where the cops pulled over a car that had made a U-turn. Believing she was secreting drugs, a police detective thrust her fingers into the woman’s vagina in a parking lot visible to the public:
The lawsuit, filed in November by attorney Jeremy Hollingshead, alleges that detective Angela Hawkins handcuffed 24-year-old Kayla Robinson after she was a passenger in a car during a routine traffic stop in 2012. Hawkins allegedly pushed the young woman up against a tractor-trailer and demanded to know where “the dope and the guns” were, according to the suit.
But the cavity search turned up no drugs. And Hawkins was later disciplined for her actions, the suit says.
The threat of a young adult woman carrying a personal amount of drugs was enough to elicit a sexual assault under the color of law.
During a search of the car’s occupants, Hawkins would later allege in an incident report that she caught Robinson trying to hide a bag of weed inside her underwear — and trying to conceal a crack rock beneath her left foot.
But while the lawsuit concedes that Robinson relinquished a small baggie of weed to Hawkins, Robinson denies possessing crack. The suit alleges that Hawkins accused her of slipping something else inside her pants — and marched her, handcuffed, approximately 200 feet to a nearby tractor trailer parking lot.
Robinson pleaded to be searched in a police station, but the detective insisted that the search take place right there. Hawkins put in a radio call, requesting a a pair of rubber gloves.
No crack rock was ever found, either in the car or in the woman’s vagina. The small baggie of weed had already been surrendered. So what sort of crime did the cops think they were stopping by thrusting some fingers inside this woman?
Committing Sexual Felonies To Prevent Drug Misdemeanors
According to NORML, the possession of up to 10 grams (first offense) of marijuana is a misdemeanor that doesn’t even include any jail time. So if that “small baggie” was a third-of-an-ounce or less, cops were sexually assaulting a woman for the result of a $500 fine with no criminal record. A baggie of 10 to 35 grams is required for that woman to eligible for one year in jail, but it is still a misdemeanor. It takes well over an ounce of marijuana to be considered a felony in Missouri.
Do the cops suppose this young black woman managed to cram over an ounce up there in the time between being pulled over and the cop tapping on the window? Or did they suppose this young lady just rides around with a vagina full of marijuana all the time?
As for the alleged rock of crack that was never found, cocaine possession has recently been downgraded in Missouri, which used to have one of the toughest laws in the nation. Now possession of a rock of crack – likely under a gram – has been reduced to a Class C felony with up to seven years of prison.
Even if you accept that cocaine is a felony, believe that the cop saw a crack rock, and grant that police need to stop felonies in progress, you’ve got to admit that this situation goes beyond the bounds of protecting public safety. One crack rock does not a crack dealer make. The cops in this situation simply sexually abused a young black woman to punish and intimidate her and others because she had a personal amount of illegal drugs on her, causing her more pain and anguish than the drugs ever would have.
Everything’s Not That Big In Texas
Before you think this is some isolated incident involving a sick cop, let’s remind you that it is not. Numerous lawsuits have shown cops to be poking, prodding, and probing both women and men in search of the drugs they’re supposedly hiding inside. Keep in mind those lawsuits are likely the tip of the iceberg, as many people don’t want the humiliation of going to trial and many others have complicated histories that make a successful jury trial difficult.
Jennifer Stelly, a Texas Corrections officer, and her boyfriend Channing Castex were pulled over by two troopers for speeding in March 2013, according to the complaint. The officers arrested Castex after they said they smelled marijuana, which he admitted to have smoked previously.
Stelly remained standing on the side of the road during the entire hour-long incident, while Castex was in the backseat of the squad car.
When the female trooper arrived, the search was performed in view of the dashboard-mounted camera in the cop car, as well as in front of the three male officers and the busy highway traffic.
This young black woman was a prison guard and that didn’t save her from being vaginally and anally penetrated in broad daylight. A similar fate befell two other young black women in Texas just a year prior:
Brandy Hamilton, 26, and Alexandria Randle, 24, told reporters how they were ordered out of their vehicle, not permitted to put on clothes to cover the bikinis they’d been wearing at the beach that day, and given cavity searches right by the side of the road.
The disturbing video of the event, which was caught on the dashcam, captures one of the women asking in disbelief, ‘Are you serious?’ when the officers tell her they’re going to give her a cavity search.
The female officer who performed the invasive search, which included inserting a finger into the women’s vaginas, is accused of using the same pair of gloves to search both women. The entire 40-minute traffic stop was caught on the trooper’s dashboard camera.
But it’s not just young black women who get stopped and probed. It happens to young white women as well, as in this case that also occurred in Texas just four months after the Stelly assault:
No ticket was issued following the lengthy traffic stop in July 2012, and no drugs were found. Angel Dobbs, 38, told The News that trooper David Farrell pulled her over on a Friday night, while she was driving to Oklahoma with her niece, Ashley, 24.
They were ordered out of the car and told to stand in a field by the roadside. Farrell told them he had called for a female office to come and search them, Dobbs said.
The dash cam video shows the aunt and niece alternately standing in front of Farrell’s patrol car, holding their arms out while [female officer] Helleson pats their breasts and puts her hand down the front and back of their pants.
“They didn’t even search my socks or my shoes,” Dobbs said. “I just couldn’t fathom how you could search someone’s butt and their vagina, and not search their socks or shoes.”
In Texas, it takes four ounces of weed possession to merit a felony charge, so all these sexual assaults were either in the service of preventing a misdemeanor or those cops thought those ladies were packing a quarter-pound or more inside their baby maker. These cases sparked so much outrage that in 2015 the state passed a law requiring that police get a warrant before they conduct roadside body cavity searches. I guess it’s better that a judge signs off on a public sexual assault by police, but I can’t help thinking that the vaginal and/or anal probing of a suspect who’s innocent until proven guilty should happen in private?
When They Hand You The Ticket, It’s Time To Leave
The all-time most heinous case of police violating a person in order to find a drug stash that wasn’t there happened to a white man in New Mexico who won a $1.6 million settlement over the ordeal.
The lawsuit states that David Eckert, 54, spent more than 12 hours in custody last January at a police station and local hospital after being pulled over for a traffic violation. Yet he was never charged, nor did authorities find illicit substances on him.
…a judge signed off a search warrant “to include but not limited to his anal cavity.” The next stop was Gila Regional Medical Center, where the lawsuit states “no drugs were found” in “an x-ray and two digital searches of his rectum by two different doctors.” One doctor at this time found nothing unusual in his stool.
Three enemas were conducted on Eckert after 10:20 p.m. A chest X-ray followed, succeeded by a colonoscopy around 1:25 a.m.
All that – two rectal probings, two x-rays, three enemas, and a colonoscopy over half a day – occurred in a state where it takes a half-pound of weed to earn a felony charge because:
- Eckert rolled through a stop sign in a Walmart parking lot;
- Eckert didn’t assert his right to leave the traffic stop after a ticket had been issued;
- Eckert volunteered to let cops search him and run a K-9 through his car;
- The K-9 alerted to Eckert’s driver’s seat;
- One cop on scene claimed to know Eckert had a criminal history with drugs.
That police are empowered to feloniously sexually assault people over misdemeanor amounts of marijuana should be all the evidence any rational person needs to judge that our drug war is an out-of-control failure that corrupts police, mocks justice, and endangers constitutional liberty.